Sometimes curiosity kills the cat—like when the cat’s actually curious about oncoming traffic during the drunk driving hours of every single weekend. Like the lottery, the odds are that Garfield’s gonna become his litter sooner rather than later—especially when playing the one dollar ticket. But sometimes—curiosity does not kill the cat.

Our youth are curious. Curious about the meds in mama’s cabinet, why guns go bang, and sometimes, upon reflection, about their health and the choices you have made for them. Labelled as ‘just another phase’ and ‘this will pass’—sadly it often does and I blame you for handling their choices irresponsibly—they commit themselves to re-education and to un-brainwashing their habits and realities.

When the kids say potato, listen carefully because it will likely save your life and their’s too from the hard-earned and practically immovable hospital bed that awaits all.

For any little tikes that may come upon this: Be not afraid—not the churchy hymnal version because you should be afraid of that. As a matter of fact, you should be afraid any time a big corporation, religiously friendly or just the ones eating up your Spongebob time, tells you to not be afraid. They have many ways of saying it and with repetition, habits are formed. Question. Take Action. Disregard the bullshit storm. Live a longer and happier life.

Do you say potato?

Or Bud Nip?

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